HOW TO WRITE A SCREENPLAY (SCRIPT) PT. 14

WRITING A SCENE FOR A SCRIPT
By now you're hopefully working on your screenplay, if not, find the time. Do whatever it takes to complete your goal, whether it takes getting up one hour earlier or staying up one hour later to write the script.

Work on ideas while driving down the road to work, but first and foremost, pay attention to the road! Listen how people actually speak to one another, it's quite different than in a novel. Use the character's traits to define their voice, and vice versa.

For example, say there is a scene involving a parking space. That alone is challenging enough, as anyone would know, but how that dialogue takes place will be dictated by the character traits. What and how things are said and done are important factors that you will be dealing with as a screenwriter. Convince your audience.

Take my main character from "Moving With Monique", in the outline I decided that she was

*irrational
*compulsive
*never satisfied

and that we needed to use one or more of those traits anytime she was acting out or facing a decision.

In a parking lot scene, it is unlikely that we will have her be irrational. If she smashes a car window or blocks someone in, that would be very unlike her personality, which we have deemed in the outline to be "overly nice".

Looking at the definition of compulsive, I like: "an irresistible impulse to act". It's likely that we can use this trait but it is important to put it in the proper context.

"Never satisfied" is a trait that we would probably associate with Monique in the meaning that she is never satisfied with herself or situation. It's a sort of frustration, and that will most likely be easy to apply to this scene.

THE SCENE
Every scene, as we know, has to move the story forward, it has to tell us something. Since the genre is "romantic-comedy", the "parking space" scene might be used simply because it is a humorous situation that most of the audience can relate to.

Monique is our protagonist, facing challenges. Now we must decide on the antagonist who will challenge her, providing the conflict in the situation.

The antagonist could be a stranger, a neighbor, someone she doesn't recognize at first but knows, and maybe that would be the funniest thing. Ever lay on your horn behind someone at a light only to find out that it's your father-in-law when you pass them? It's funny because we're more inclined to act out against strangers on the road than someone we know.

Since Helga is Monique's boss, and we want the audience to back Monique, no matter how reckless she is, I want Helga to appear unexpectedly as the antagonist in the scene. It's like when the villain shows up out of nowhere to spoil things.

We haven't covered Helga's traits but so far we can guess she is

*cold
*to the point
*relentless

and we can probably use all three traits in this scene.

As for the setting, we want to surprise the audience, so the parking lot at Monique's workplace is not a good choice. To help me in my decision, I want to figure out what kind of mood Monique is in. She could be exiting the drugstore, having picked up meds for a nasty head cold. More interesting to me, however, is that she is enjoying one of her very few fun activities, doing her favorite thing, and then Helga appears and spoils the moment.

As far as props, what would Monique drive? Maybe a cute little car, like a VW Bug, or, to underscore the fact that she doesn't make much money we could put her in a beat up station wagon, that would be really pathetic.

And Helga? Maybe a giant Cadillac, big Mercedes, something that represents her power as the boss.

I have to start the scene with Monique enjoying her moment so we know she is having a good day.

INT. STICKY SWEET CLOTHING STORE - DAY

Your average boutique-type place to shop, where the "petites" section makes up most of the store.

Monique swipes her credit card on the machine, glows about her find to the TEENY CASHIER.

MONIQUE
I can't believe you had these in a size ten--

TEENY CASHIER
(dryly)
We don't... normally.

MONIQUE
Do you expect to get any in red?

TEENY CASHIER
No, I'd check next door-- at Lane Bryant.

Monique is so thrilled with her purchase, doesn't notice the cynicism of the remark.

MONIQUE
Thank you so much!

TEENY CASHIER
–-?

EXT. STRIP MALL PARKING LOT - DAY

Monique skips to her car, humming a tune. She has to squeeze in sideways to get in between her vehicle and the closely parked "four wheelin" type truck.

MONIQUE
(straining)
Just-one-more-inch, erghh!

INT. STATION WAGON - DAY

Monique turns up the radio, SINGS to a pop song, shifts into reverse, backs out without looking.

SUDDENLY--

A THUD!

She looks in the rearview, shifts into park, opens her door right into the side of the four wheeler truck.

Peering out of the door on a vertical horizon, she sees a tall female figure in a trenchoat, standing at the end of the vehicles.

MONIQUE
Hey lady, you should watch where you're going!

HELGA
(angrily)
Monique?

MONIQUE
Helga??

HELGA
That figures!!

FADE OUT

Of course, we could cut it right there or continue, but if we do go on, the dailogue is going to have to be very funny. We got our point across: Monique was having a great day and ruined it by not paying attention and being compulsive, again, and Helga was there to see her screw up and to be one of her "victims". This will definitely raise the ongoing tension between the two at the workplace.

Work on your scenes and have a good write!