ITALIAN RUSH HOUR, PT. III

EXT. POMPEII PATH - MORNING

The Guard searches the grounds for Brian and his Lovely Wife. In the distance, he sees a number of tourists entering Pompeii's coliseum, one alabaster individual in cargo shorts sticking out.

GUARD
(to himself in italian accent)
That must be him!

CUT TO:

EXT. POMPEII COLISEUM - MORNING

Brian and his Lovely Wife tread on the packed, white gravel to the center, surveying the circle.

BRIAN
(to Lovely Wife)
Wow, it's like a mini version of the one in Rome..

LOVELY WIFE
And supposedly this was the first one..

They spot the Guard entering through the portal with an air of authority.

GUARD
(loudly)
You!

Everyone in the group turns their head.

GUARD
(annoyed)
No, I mean white guy.

Only half the group is turning their head. The Guard is still advancing.

GUARD
(pissed)
Really PALE one!

Only Brian is turning his head.

BRIAN
(to Lovely Wife)
I think he means me.

The Guard steps up to Brian, they are face to face.

BRIAN
Prego?

GUARD
Show me you money.

BRIAN
(agast)
What??

GUARD
I said show me you money.

LOVELY WIFE
I think he wants to inspect our bills.

BRIAN
Either that, or this is his Jerry McGuire skit!

Brian pulls out his wallet, passes a bill to the guard, who then holds it up in the blazing sunlight.

GUARD
(authoritive)
This, is COUNTERFEIT!

BRIAN
(denial)
No, no, we just got that from a bank, dude.. well an exchange at the Naples main train station.

GUARD
Come with me.

The Guard turns and marches off, peers over his shoulder as if they should follow. They trail slowly.

LOVELY WIFE
(questioning)
What do we do now?

BRIAN
(confident)
Don't worry, I've got a plan.

They march through the coliseum portal, Guard leading.

LOVELY WIFE
Which is??

BRIAN
(loud whisper)
To RUN!! Let's GO!!

With the Guard headed left, the pair splits to the right in an all out sprint, Brian's white stems flashing by.

GUARD
(on radio)
I have them in custody.

CUT TO:

EXT. POMPEII VILLAGE STREETS - AFTERNOON

Brian and his Lovely Wife walk slowly, winded, sweaty. They've escaped their captor.

LOVELY WIFE
(laughing)
That was just like in the movies!

BRIAN
I hope so, this IS a script, after all!

LOVELY WIFE
How did you know where to make all those turns?

BRIAN
I could say through years of studying these streets on maps, but the truth is it's just easier on Wikipedia.

They laugh, approach a street fountain where tourists are lined up, filling water bottles.

BRIAN
We ought to tank up here.

Crabby tourists stand in file, sweating and bitching about waiting in line.

LOVELY WIFE
(whispers)
Embarrassing!

BRIAN
I know, you'd think they'd have simple vending machines here or something!

Over their shoulders, we see a distant yet approaching group of uniformed individuals.. MORE GUARDS!

BRIAN
Oh shit!

TO BE CONTINUED...